ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
