Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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