maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
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All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
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I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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