Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (416): View more from Ontario

  I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment... http://tfl.nu/srde
  Replies (8) Good night (2956) Bad night (826)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen. http://tfl.nu/75lv
  Replies (32) Good night (1483) Bad night (2966)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials. http://tfl.nu/rax4
  Replies (19) Good night (3430) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you. http://tfl.nu/hptp
  Replies (11) Good night (973) Bad night (3612)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Strippers tramp stamp says "mom" http://tfl.nu/an62
  Replies (21) Good night (878) Bad night (4496)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat. http://tfl.nu/gqde
  Replies (96) Good night (1609) Bad night (7758)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall http://tfl.nu/ckaq
  Replies (25) Good night (5574) Bad night (959)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock. http://tfl.nu/8w5i
  Replies (13) Good night (1422) Bad night (6675)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it. http://tfl.nu/dm7u
  Replies (44) Good night (8156) Bad night (2619)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce. http://tfl.nu/vye8
  Replies (20) Good night (4394) Bad night (972)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about. http://tfl.nu/tvk3
  Replies (4) Good night (4049) Bad night (929)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs". http://tfl.nu/ppqp
  Replies (23) Good night (8976) Bad night (980)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja http://tfl.nu/0h0h
  Replies (9) Good night (5227) Bad night (919)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year http://tfl.nu/s0i5
  Replies (2) Good night (1195) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.

  (214): View more from Texas

  SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME. (214): SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME. http://tfl.nu/sfja
  Replies (12) Good night (1170) Bad night (436)

Randomize