What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
