: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
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