Me. At least after what I've been through.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
