Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
