The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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