I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
