the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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