He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
