Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize