is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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