Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Randomize