I got chris browned last night
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
