No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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