You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
