Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
