Texts From Last Night

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  (562): View more from California

  Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.

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  (562): Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace. http://tfl.nu/mzqe
  Replies (8) Good night (1050) Bad night (513)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive

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  (651): After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive http://tfl.nu/5g38
  Replies (16) Good night (613) Bad night (3128)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  god i miss watching you do this...

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  (612): so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim.. (507): god i miss watching you do this... http://tfl.nu/jwsv
  Replies (16) Good night (5025) Bad night (708)
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  (209): View more from California

  I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.

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  (209): I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope. http://tfl.nu/7xzu
  Replies (42) Good night (5949) Bad night (611)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car

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  (401): yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car http://tfl.nu/wwsk
  Replies (11) Good night (826) Bad night (3333)
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  (818): View more from California

  why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?

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  (818): why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing? http://tfl.nu/8p36
  Replies (26) Good night (1014) Bad night (3562)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Are you still at the party or did I leave?

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  (404): Are you still at the party or did I leave? http://tfl.nu/pph4
  Replies (18) Good night (6923) Bad night (969)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.

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  (516): I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay. http://tfl.nu/nx25
  Replies (35) Good night (6210) Bad night (1141)
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  (587): View more from Alberta

  Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea

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  (587): Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea http://tfl.nu/gdya
  Replies (5) Good night (2752) Bad night (1482)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Who are you high with right now?

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  (513): chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it. (513): Who are you high with right now? http://tfl.nu/0n4i
  Replies (11) Good night (2032) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?

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  (614): I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening? http://tfl.nu/furs
  Replies (18) Good night (1537) Bad night (1601)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!

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  (618): the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!! http://tfl.nu/py94
  Replies (3) Good night (1796) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.

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  (303): I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now. http://tfl.nu/8ew5
  Replies (7) Good night (402) Bad night (1701)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.

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  (502): Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high. http://tfl.nu/rams
  Replies (0) Good night (908) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.

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  (541): I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night. http://tfl.nu/uir8
  Replies (2) Good night (630) Bad night (356)

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