I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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