do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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