they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Randomize
