I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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