Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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