I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
