is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I got inside last night via doggy door
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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