she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
The beer is more important than you right now.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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