I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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