she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
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The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
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I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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