i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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