After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
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I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
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He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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