Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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