I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
