it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize