THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
