He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
