party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
