I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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