the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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