have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
