Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
