Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
