I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
