Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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