i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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