oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize