Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sobbing to NWA
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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