We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
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