What a fucking waste of an outfit
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
